Eighth Grade is a film that delves deep into the awkwardness and anxieties of a blooming 13 or 14-year-old. As the writer and director, Bo Burnham, phrased it, “You’re in eighth grade and you’re a mess.” Their bodies are “exploding” and are put in these awkward situations. The eighth grade experience has changed with the rise of the internet and social media, and this film represents how it infiltrates our lives. Unlike other films, the internet is not portrayed as a villain. Rather, a constant companion that is always there, whether waking up or going to sleep.

Elsie Fisher plays Kayla Day: a shy, anxious, brave, and inspiring eighth grader. The film begins as Kayla records a vlog, explaining how important and freeing it is to be yourself. Through out the film, it is clear she is not the person she appears to be in her videos, and that she acts more confident, popular, and outgoing in her videos. Burnham described her online personality versus reality personality as, “Who we hope to be versus who we’re scared we might be.” Its not a bad thing that Kayla portrays herself as who she wants to be.

Burnham continues to talk about how even at that age, kids are performing for themselves. Social media acts as a 24/7 mirror. They want others to think they’re living the best life, even if its not the case. They try to be someone better than they currently are, and an easy way to portray this new personality is through social media.

**SPOILERS**

Eighth Grade explores Kayla’s last two weeks of eighth grade. She wins the “Most Quiet” award after a monologue describing how she has a lot of things to say, and if people talked to her, she would say them. The most popular girl in school’s mom invites Kayla to a pool party. Two sub stories are going on as the mom invites Kayla. One is that the mom is interested in Kayla’s single dad, which is the real reason she invited Kayla. The second, is that the popular girl, Kennedy, does not want Kayla to attend. Kayla knows this, but Kayla’s dad and Kennedy’s mom does not understand this. So, despite her protests, Kayla attends the pool party.

As any puberty stricken middle schooler knows, pool parties are the worst. They’re awkward, embarrassing, and its worse when you know you were invited under false pretenses. Kayla feels all of this, and she has an anxiety attack in the bathroom. The anxiety attack subsides, and she steps out to the pool party.

She meets Kennedy’s cousin, Gabe, who is nice and keeps doing underwater handstands. Then, the pinnacle of awkward moments at a birthday party where you know you aren’t invited happens: the group picture. Kayla tries to hide in the back, but the mom brings her down to the front. To top it off, they open gifts after the picture. Kennedy loves everyone’s gift besides Kayla’s. Most middle schoolers would feel defeated after this pool party. And, she does. She sits in a room by herself, calls her dad, and begs him to pick her up. But then, her crush walks in and invites her to join the rest of the group. Her courage shines as she not only joins the group, but volunteers to sing karaoke.

Kayla’s bravery begins to rise through out the film as she continues to talk to her crush. She heard he broke up with his ex girlfriend because she wouldn’t send him nude pictures. So, she “casually” mentions that she has a random file on her phone of nude photos. And by “casually” she brings out her phone and says, “Oh my god…that’s so embarrassing…haha…like wow that would’ve been embarrassing…….do you want to know what would have been embarrassing?” He eventually responds with an uninterested, “sure.” And that’s when she tells him she almost accidentally opened her file of dirty pictures. Finally, he is interested and asks if she does blow jobs. Kayla is quick to say yes, even though the audience knows that is not true.

This begins the start to a great scene of Kayla looking up videos on how to give a blow job. She goes downstairs to practice with a banana. Just as she’s about to begin, her dad walks in. He’s perplexed because he knows she doesn’t like bananas. This causes an awkward stand off between Kayla and dad as Kayla attempts to eat and enjoy a banana. After the first bite, she spits it out and runs upstairs. Luckily, her dad doesn’t realize the real purpose of the banana.

Kayla attends a high school shadow program. At first it seems like her high school mentor is not going to show up, but then her mentor, Olivia, bursts into frame. She immediately says hi and profusely compliments Kayla. Olivia takes an interest in Kayla, spending the day with her and giving her advice. She gives Kayla her number and calls her a friend.

Later, Kayla calls Olivia. She’s nervous and knows it’s a little strange to call rather than text, but, Olivia answers, doesn’t think its weird, and they have a great conversation. Olivia even invites Kayla to hang out with her and her high school friends. Kayla is both excited and anxious as she accepts the invitation.

Kayla’s first official high school hang out seemingly goes great, until the awkward, tense, and cringe inducing moment when a high school boy gives Kayla a ride home and pressures her. He pulls over and hops in the backseat of the car. He pulls a classic tactic, and tries to play truth or dare with Kayla. Its clear that he’s trying to make the game sexual and that makes Kayla extremely uncomfortable. He asks her about her sexual experience, takes his own shirt off, and then dares her to take her shirt off. When she refuses he makes her feel bad about it, and he gives her a speech that it would be better for her if she went along with it.

Despite the fact nothing physical happened between the two, Kayla still experienced a violation of her comfort zone. The situation could have ended completely different. The boy put pressure on her that she hadn’t felt before, and the fact that pressure will be there for the rest of her life, especially when she knows she isn’t ready for it…that’s extremely overwhelming and scary. It is clear Kayla is emotionally changed after the night in the car. The innocent and naïve side of her is stripped away.

She breaks down after this experience. She ends her vlog and burns her sixth grade time capsule. This leads to a moment with her dad where she’s burning the capsule, and he says,” I hope there wasn’t anything important in there.” Kayla responds, “No. Just my hopes and dreams.”

After she burns her capsule, her and her dad have a real and honest conversation which leads her to confronting her anxiety. Something that the actress, Elsie Fisher, also has, and something a lot of middle schoolers have.

Kayla doesn’t let the emotional damage destroy her. Instead, she gains the confidence to stand up for herself. Instead of constantly trying to be popular, Kayla decides to hang out with people she truly likes: Gabe. She makes a new and encouraging video to her future high school self. Through out the last two weeks of eighth grade, Kayla changes, but she changes in a way that she becomes a better version of herself. Its okay to lose yourself sometimes, as long as you find your way back in the end.

1. HEART TO HEART

Kayla and her dad, Mark, have a conversation about sadness while burning her time capsule. She asks if she’s the reason HE IS SAD. He admits that he does have sadness day to day, but it’s not because of her. That’s just how life is. Instead, he is incredibly proud of her. This support and validation from her dad encourages her to better herself. Kayla singing karaoke at the pool party. This scene showcases her bravery and inner confidence. She was just hiding in the other room, and after being invited to join the group by her crush, she volunteers to sing karaoke. The audience holds their breath as they wait for the kids to make fun of her and ruin the moment. Instead, the scene remains as a pure and proud moment for Kayla.

2. KAREOKE AT A POOL PARTY

This scene showcases Kayla’s bravery and inner confidence. She was just hiding in the other room, and after being invited to join the group by her crush, she volunteers to sing karaoke. The audience holds their breath as they wait for the kids to make fun of her and ruin the moment. Instead, the scene remains as a pure and proud moment for Kayla.

3. JUST DON’T MAKE EYE CONTACT

Kayla telling off Kennedy while not making eye contact the entire time is one of the best scenes in the film. Kayla shows her own bravery and becomes her own hero as she tells Kennedy why she does not want to be friends with her anymore. Kayla has been nothing but nice, and Kennedy constantly ignore and is rude to her. In this scene Kayla exudes her bravery while still demonstrating her anxiety and shyness by not making eye contact and looking down the entire time. She doesn’t shed her shyness, rather she embraces it. So, as a voice for shy girls everywhere: you go Kayla, I’m proud of you girl.

4. A COUPLE OF WEIRDOS

One of the best friendships from the film are between Kennedy’s cousin, Caleb, and Kayla. They met at Kennedy’s pool party, and it was clear Caleb was only there because he was her cousin. They were both outcasts, and they bonded as Caleb tried to entertain Kayla as she stayed reserved. There’s a blissful moment in life when you decide to stop trying to be popular. If you aren’t already popular, most of the time you’re trying to become popular. This means wearing the best clothes, hanging out with only “cool” people, and trying really really really hard. Near the end of the film, Kayla stops trying to be friends with Kennedy and realizes she doesn’t need to be popular. This opens herself up to a pure friendship with Caleb. They share a sweet moment together as the eat chicken nuggets and are able to be their weird selves together.

5. JUST WRITE A LIST AND IT’LL BE FINE

Kayla writing down a list of how to be more popular/talk more/have more friends. I truly hope no one thought this was unrealistic, because I had a similar list in middle school. This scene was a personal favorite of mine due to the similarities of trying to make friends and be popular that both I and Kayla experience. Seeing a character with this list, shyness, and anxieties made my eighth grade heart happy as I felt represented and less alone. If I saw this film when I was in eighth grade I probably would have felt a lot better about myself and realized how silly it was to change yourself for people who don’t actually want to be your friend.

 

ANXIETY

Through out the film, Kayla struggles with her anxiety and only realizes she has anxiety at the end. She voices her struggle and describes it as a bubbling, constant weird feeling of nervousness and that something might go wrong. It’s not just before a test or big decision…its constant, with no specific trigger. And so many people, especially young people, struggle with anxiety. Most kids don’t realize they’re struggling with anxiety; they just think they’re being dramatic. In Eighth Grade, the protagonist does not “cure” or “overcome” their anxiety. Rather, she embraces that it will be part of her life forever, and this portrayal reminds those who have anxiety that they’re not alone. Through this film, Elsie Fisher, has been given a platform to speak about the anxiety and how she copes.

PARENT & CHILD RELATIONSHIPS

My favorite relationship in this film is the relationship between Kayla, and her dad, Mark. One of the most accurate scenes is at the dinner table. Kayla has head her headphones in and is searching through her phone. Mark keeps trying to ask her how her day was, how she is, and have a simple conversation with her daughter. Instead of engaging, Kayla acts annoyed and just wants to look at her phone. I remember this feeling all too well from middle school. Sweeter moments happen between Kayla and Mark through out the film. At times, Mark embarrasses Kayla, but that’s what all parents do at some point. Their relationship grows immensely at the end when they open up to each other and Mark voices he’s proud of Kayla.

SEX

Eighth Grade does not shy away from middle schoolers learning more about sex. Kayla learning more about sex and her sexuality is a major theme through out the movie. There are scenes of Kayla lusting over pictures of her crush, watching videos on how to give a blow job, and being aware that some guys want nude pictures. Her innocence and naivety remain intact until the moment she is in the backseat of the car with the high school “friend”. This is the moment where sex turns into something that can be bad, and this moment changes Kayla.

SOCIAL MEDIA

Instead of shying away from portraying social media, Eighth Grade shows how attached we are to our phones. This is not meant to be a “look at how the young people only care about their phones” lesson. In reality, everyone is on their phones. Constantly. As Burnham said, “Why are we all acting like eighth graders on the internet?” “We’re going through an eighth grade moment right now”. Instead of asking “why are we on our phones?” its, “how does social media affect us?” Kayla uses Vlogs, Snapchat, and Instagram. She is no stranger to the internet and social media. This is often how relationships and friendships begin and last in these days. Which is scary and strange, and Eighth Grade takes note of that. Also, being able to see yours likes and comments versus everyone else’s makes it easy to compare yourself to others. Everyone on social media only shows the best of their life. Which makes it easy to be insecure. Eighth Grade shows this complicated relationship between an eighth grader and their phone, and it acts as a mirror to the audience.